Scatterbrainy

/There are those who say that temptation can be barricaded beyond the door.
The ones who think that stray desires can be driven out of the heart like the moneychangers from the temple.
Maybe they can, if you patrol your weak points day and night, don't look, don't smell, don't dream/
- Winterson.

Lately I'm coming back to this discourse and suddenly (law of attraction) everything is about this.
About letting yourself go, feeling whatever you feel, indulge in passion;
OR barricading, guarding, defending your outposts against future pain and potential threats.
It sounds straight forward enough, right?
Why choose to restrain yourself when you can let yourself be overthrown by passion?
I guess hindsight is a very nasty thing.
It is always in retrospect we question our options.


Met George Clooney on a street in Vienna....
Incidentally, his character in "Up in the air" would have had a lot to say about this
.....................................................................................................................

There is something with difficulty that attracts me.
I know this is not a desirable feature of my personality.
Complication pulls me close and I am defenseless in its presence.
It is not the difficulty per se that I crave,
but the feeling that comes with the achievment of the nearly impossible.
I need the heaviness; the burden of being.
Dark elements of despair sugar-coated with hopefully naïve optimism,
that is the way I deal with reality. My reality.

"SO???", I can hear you wondering. "No conclusion?No punchline?What a crappy discourse..."
But you should have learnt by now that I believe that dialectics shape our world.
- No right or wrong answers, just the constant questioning.