Scatterbrainy

Amidst the high ideals and ambitious plans of De Gaulle that I have been concerned with lately,
I started reflecting over my own ideals and ambitions.
Now, I am only at the beginning of my life (mashallah...),
but I think I've managed to gain some useful experiences and insights along the way.
And I suddenly realized that the common denominator  of those is hard work.
All the important things I've done in my "real life" have been really hard work. A few examples:

I slaved away for years at McDonald's for a bad salary and without gratification
I worked day and night as an au-pair in Italy for a very modest compensation
I definitely slaved for months as an entertainer for lazy Italian tourists and their spoiled Neapolitan brats.
I sold my 24-hour-day to the United Nations during my internship while simultaneously taking courses.
Now, this is not a bragging post.
Hold your horses, contemplation, analysis and conclusion will follow.



Just because I worked my ass off in a slave-like manner, that doesn't mean there were no benefits.
My UN internship was the very most rewarding time of my life, no matter how long my working days were and how tired I was in the morning. Getting dressed up and singing for a bunch of sunburnt Italians might not be the dream of my life, but the time at La Serra gave my self-esteem an enormous boost and I met some amazing people. As an au-pair I not only became immerged in the Italian culture, met my first love and mastered the Italian language; it was also- up until then- the best time of my life. And although it is difficult to see the clear positive side of working at McDonald's, it was my first real work experience which over time gave me some sort of work ethics, pride and even professionalism.

I don't want to go through life the light and easy way. I want to remain faithful to difficulty, because it makes us noble. But the trick is not to expose yourself to suffering and difficulty intentionally. For me, the most important thing is to find the positive parts. They say that if you can't do what you love, you must love what you do.
And maybe you can't love all of it, but they you better find that tiny part of it that you can love, because it is going to make all the difference. And even though I never consciously thought about this before, I think I just have that capacity to fall in love with whatever thing I have to do and it helps me be fully satisfied with whatever that is.



And,

The heavier the burden,
the closer our lives come to the earth;
the more real and truthful they become.
                               - Milan Kundera.